Let It Go

When something is broken, fix it. That’s what we’re always told, isn’t it?

But, what if that isn’t the answer? What if it’s better to cut our losses in search of something better and more rewarding?

Letting people go is a hard life hack to master, purely because we’re a society of clingers. We try so desperately to hold on to things even when they’ve served us beyond their purpose.

Losing people is a natural part of growing up, but when we’re encompassed in a society that is constantly changing, we’re led to believe that everyone we lose is a loss.

Society brainwashes us into thinking that nothing positive can amount from losing someone who meant everything to us. Every friendship and relationship is a learning curve, so instead of mourning the people who aren’t present, we should celebrate filtering people out who no longer serve as support.

Loss can be one of the most painful feelings to endure but over time, the pain lessens and our eyes are opened to the fact that we don’t actually need that person anymore.

It might not seem like it at the time, but good things end so great things can happen.

We, as individuals, have the mental capacity to judge who has a positive impact on our lives, meaning someone can only be defined as a loss if we choose to define them as one.

Regardless of the circumstances, everything happens for a reason. Even though it might not seem like it at the time, there’s an explanation as to why that person isn’t in our lives anymore.

It might bring sadness, heartache and regret, but each loss takes us on a journey which makes us stronger.

Picking up the pieces, planting a smile on our faces and finding comfort in the fact that things will get better is the first step toward learning to be truly happy on our own. Because, what’s the point in wasting our time and energy on people who remain standstill?

If someone enriches our experiences and shapes our memories, they might be worthy of our time. And if not? So be it. We need to stop trying to force things because we’re scared to be without someone. We need to stop clinging on to things just because we don’t remember ourselves without them.

And we need to stop worrying, and believe that things will be okay in the end. If things aren’t okay, it’s not the end.

If someone doesn’t treat us how we deserve, we shouldn’t accept their behavior just because it’s what we think we deserve. We don’t have to settle.

People have an unhealthy habit of hurting the ones closest to them, but we can choose not to fall victim to that. We don’t have to deal with being in a constant state of angst or worry because we should never discredit our instincts.

Our bodies pick up vibrations, and if something deep inside us says something isn’t right about a situation or a person, we need to trust it. Acting on gut feeling and intuition instead of emotion and persuasion is the best way to decide who can stay and who needs to go.

While it’s hard to accept that not everyone who enters our life is meant to stay, we as human beings are built to encounter new people. We’re designed to explore, discover and grow, and not be held back by people who don’t have the same capacity as us.

So when we feel like we’re falling apart, we need to remind ourselves how that person made us feel. Not when we were naively content, but when we were achingly sad and bitterly confused.

Life is too short to be anything but happy, so we need to learn to surround ourselves with people who matter. We either grow with, or grow apart from people, and if it doesn’t feel right, it might be best to let it go.

People will become strangers and distant memories, but we don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from our lives.

Nobody has the right to infect us with negativity and doubt. There will come a point in life when we’ll get tired of having to prove ourselves and we’ll get bored of trying to fix things.

It’s not giving up; it’s realizing we deserve more. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with putting ourselves first for once, and the sooner we do that, the better.

Because, after all, our broken moments don’t define us. It’s how we deal with them that does.

The A.C.T.S. of Prayer: The Practice of My Simplified Prayer Life {CONFESSION}

CONFESSION:The act of coming to God with my wrong-doing or sin.

“Confess yourself to heaven: Repent what’s past, avoid what is to come.”

~ William Shakespeare

Sin and transgression are used interchangeably in reference to our wrong-doing in this life. From my studies, there is a clear distinction between the two, even though they can affect one another. While sin is missing the mark of whatever it is you are working to attain, transgression is a willing act or offense against a law or rule. It's easy to see them as the same, considering confession and forgiveness are needed in order to move on from each. Confession to self, confession to God, forgiveness of self, forgiveness of others, are all necessary. Being unforgiving (towards self and others) can even be looked at as a sin or transgression, depending on the intent of the person who is required to forgive. One thing I know for sure, is that when I come to God with my sin, I am assured forgiveness from Him, as well as myself. I come away feeling lighter, and most times, much wiser (especially if I'm asking for wisdom, but that's something else to talk about)! The important thing for me, is to be open about all of my foolassery, even though He knows everything that I think and do - I want all of my bases covered - so complete honesty with myself is key. That way, I'm assured of being honest with God.

Who can understand why we do wrong? I ask the Lord to cleanse me from secret faults. To keep me also from presumptuous sins. Let them have no dominion over me, so that I shall be blameless and innocent of great transgressions. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in His sight. My Lord, my strength and my redeemer.^[4]  When I come to God in prayer, I acknowledge my sin to Him and my iniquity I do not hide. I confess my transgressions to the Lord, and He forgives the iniquity of my sin.^[5]  I ask that God have mercy on me, according to His lovingkindness, according to the multitude of His tender mercies, and to blot out my transgressions. I desire for Him to wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin, as I acknowledge that my transgressions and my sins are always before me. Against Him, only Him, have I sinned and done evil in His sight - that He may be found just when He speaks, and blameless when He judges.^[6] 

I know that if I cover my sin, I will not prosper. But when I confess and forsake my sin and transgression, God will place His mercy upon me.^[7]  For if I say that I have fellowship with Him, but walk in darkness, I’m lying and not practicing truth. But if I walk in the light as He is in the light, I have fellowship with and the blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanses me from all sin. If I say that I have no sin, I deceive only myself, and the truth is not in me. But if I confess my sins, He is faithful and just to forgive me of my sins and to cleanse me from all unrighteousness. If I say that I have not sinned, I make God a liar, and His word is not in me.^[8] Once again, this is my relationship with Him. It's important to me, so the least I can do is trust Him with my "stuff".

---

^[4] Psalm 19:12-14

^[5] Psalm 32:5

^[6] Psalm 51:1-4, 10-13

^[7] Proverbs 28:13

^[8] 1 John 1:6-9

The A.C.T.S. of Prayer: The Practice of My Simplified Prayer Life {ACKNOWLEDGMENT}

ACKNOWLEDGMENT - The recognition of God’s existence, validity, and authority in my life.

“It is in the process of being worshiped that God communicates His presence to men.”

 ~ C.S. Lewis

O, come let us adore Him! We sing this as part of a hymn in worship and praise to Jesus, never really paying attention to the words that we memorized as children. But when I look at how good God is to me, I realize that I do adore Him, and worship is one of the best ways that I can express it to Him. The Lord desires our praises, and he is more than worthy.

When I come to Him in prayer, I come first in acknowledgment of His sovereignty over every area of my life, and what He means to me. This is just one aspect of my relationship with God, and like my other relationships, it is important to me that He understands how I feel about Him. How much I love Him and how special He is to me. And why not? Every day of my life, He acknowledges who I am to Him, and gives me so much more...

Therefore, I present myself before God, and I trust in the Him with all of my heart, leaning not on my own understanding, but in all of my ways, I acknowledge Him, and he directs my paths.^[1] I follow King David’s example when I proclaim that blessed is He, the Lord God of Israel, my Heavenly Father, forever and ever. His is the greatness, the power and the glory, the victory and majesty. For all that is in heaven and in earth is the Lord’s. His is the kingdom and He is exalted as head over all. Both richness and honor come from Him, and He reigns over all. In His hand is power and might. In His hand it is to make great and to give strength to all.^[2] He is my God!  Early in my day I seek Him, my flesh longs for Him in a dry and thirsty land where there is no water. So I look for Him in the sanctuary, to see His power and His glory. Because His loving-kindness is better than life, my lips praise Him, and I bless Him while I live. I lift my hands up in His name. My soul is satisfied as with marrow and fatness, and my mouth praises Him with joyful lips. I remember Him at the end of my day, and I meditate on Him in the night watches. Because He has been my help, therefore in the shadow of His wings I rejoice. My soul follows close behind Him and His right hand upholds me.^[3] This is who He is, and this is what He does!

---

^[1] Proverbs 3:5-6

^[2] 1Chronicles 29:10-12

^[3] Psalm 63:1-8

Sitting in My Chair

In my waking dream, the first thing I saw was a big, cushioned, high back chair with black flower print. Let me back up some, because the chair formed out of a large smooth ball of clay... So the chair is black and flower printed, and now I'm looking up at an older version of myself, who is sitting in the chair, telling of dreams that were the stories of my youth that were long forgotten, but eventually remembered by my adult self and manifested into the reality of my older self, who is sitting in this amazing chair, made just for her, having a conversation with a crowd of people sitting at her feet, listening intently, all seeming to know her and the others around them. I suddenly long to sit with her in this seemingly comfortable chair, and in that moment of longing, I realize that the reason these dreamstories are so important, and the reason she shares them with this strange  group of familiar faces, is because she is me, they are my descendants, and this is their dream/story too...

LOVE Under New Management

I love me some Him. I'll never love this way again.

That is my truth, because I am a woman in love.

How many ways do I love Him? I can't even count the ways.

I just love being in love with Him.

When I met Him, I could barely love myself.

I was too busy giving and receiving that "please baby, baby please - smack it up, flip it, rub it down" kind of love. Oh, no...

I was caught up in the kind of "love" that never fails to disappoint.

Then He came along, and showed me that true LOVE never fails.

He Loves me when I am unlovely. I can't help but love Him, because He first Loved me...

He keeps me when I don't want to kept, and so faithfully meets every single one of my needs.

When I am lost in lust, He takes my hand, speaks to my heart, and Loves me completely - from the inside out...

I sometimes wonder what kind of love this is, and why me?

Without hesitation, He simply says, "As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love."

Ooo-ooo wee... That's what I'm talking about! A LOVE Supreme...

So now I am a woman - not just in love - but in love under new management.

Someone very special came into my life, and no one can take His place.

Only He can fill my empty space.

I'M IN LOVE UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT...

Reflection

I've got alot going on. Works in progress, projects in preparation stages. Lots to do, and my mind constantly in motion.

I thank God for the conversations he allows me to think that I'm having with myself. The ones where I'm sorting things out, either in my mind or out loud. The ones where I come to a conclusion - believing that I've gotten it all figured out - then he quietly, subtly, interjects His Truth, leaving me with no doubt.

Epiphany...

Yeah, I really love those moments.

Like Water for Wine

So, I'm back on my school grind, and my fall quarter starts out with Hydrotherapy - the use of water to revitalize, maintain, and restore health. 

I was none too thrilled about having to take this class, but it is required for my HHP program, so I'm getting it out of the way. This is the attitude that I walked into class with, but left with a better understanding of what Hydrotherapy is and how it relates to not only my practice, but my own well-being. 

I now understand why anytime my children complain about an ache, pain, headache or whatever - in all of my mommawisdomhood - I, without flinching, will prescribe a cup of water or a long shower, to soothe whatever ails them. Or why when I wash my hands or take a shower, I alternate between hot and cold water. Why? Because it works! My son swears by the shower cure... 

One of the most important things that I've learned, is that our bodies - being made up of 70% water - are most nearly fully hydrated when we divide our body weight by two, then drink that amount of water in ounces daily. 

Hydration formula expample: 130lbs / 2 = 65lbs .... presto, chango! 65oz water daily 

So now I'm on day four of my hydration challenge, and it has gotten easier as each day goes by. I can now tell the difference when I have not had my first 24oz or so for the day, and I no longer need to hit the head every 30 minutes - now I'm able to last for about an hour... 

I have to say that I am feeling better, am not having the sweet cravings that contributed to my gaining almost 20lbs in less than two months (WTW?!?! Yes, smh....), and will likely keep this up for life. 

Did I mention that I don't have to give up my wine? The water intake is in addition to whatever else you drink during the day. Thank You Lord for the water, and Thank You Jesus for the wine! 

We've Got to Do Better

Most of us seem to be taking our financial advice from those around us who aren't doing much better than we are. Those who would have us in debt and slaves to credit for status' sake, so that we can say, "Look at my house, my car and ALL of my stuff (even though my mortgage is upside down and I have no equity, my car is a depreciating asset and the fact that I still owe on the loan means it's not really an asset at all, and my 'stuff' is just sitting and not benefiting anyone)."  These same folks are working all of their adult lives but leaving no legacy to their future generations - nothing more than some trinkets and maybe some life insurance (if it's not eaten up by the debts that are left behind). Backwards thinking, and definitely not the future that our ancestors sacrificed and worked so hard to build for us. When and where did we get led astray?

Going forward, let us purpose to educate ourselves financially and try sitting at the feet of the true "have's", so that we can learn how to make money work for us - not the other way around - by creating and sustaining generational wealth for our children and grandchildren, which will enable us to be a greater benefit to our communities as well. Just a not so random thought, manifested from what I see and experience in my own environment on a daily basis. In the words of Dr. Tiffany Monroe, "You've got to choose a side."  I'm choosing to change my mindset - for my future generations - in order to break the cycle of financial ignorance and the "go figure it out yourself" mentality, and purposing to live in financial freedom.  Have you chosen your side?

Here We Go...

Recently, and on several occasions, I've been "challenged" on who I am, what I believe and what I have to say.  I don't claim to be perfect, I'm not always right, but that doesn't mean that I'm always wrong.  

I'm a follower of Jesus Christ and the mother of three amazing children.  Never in my life will I feel guilty about or apologize for either of these facts - they are what make me the woman that I am - nor will I even attempt to make anyone feel better about themselves by degrading myself or downplaying my truth.

God is my foundation, my strength, my help, and Jesus is the lover of my soul. Whatever He calls me to do, I willingly do. My children are gifts from God, whom I can't imagine living my life without. We love each other unconditionally, and support each other unceasingly.  It is more than an obligation, it is an honor to be their Momma.

The fact that I am raising my children by myself as a solo mom, and that I'm not complaining about or apologizing for my life's choices, seems to confuse some and inspire others.  The fact that I'm a saint, saved by God's grace - who occasionally sins - and that scripture instructs me to share my testimony and God's word with others, seems to offend some and uplift others.

I have no control over anyone else's ego or reaction to me, they may see something in me that they don't see in themselves. That realization can either be hurtful or helpful, depending on the person.  All I will say is this: I am God's creation, uniquely and purposely made in His image and likeness - nothing and no one on this earth can make or break me as long as I remain in God's will for my life - to that end, you can love me or leave me alone.

Truth IS! Slogan Tees, and then some!

Truth IS! Slogan Tees

My sister brought to my attention that some folk who read my blog may not realize when they see a pic of a tee-shirt along with my post, that it is an actual shirt that is available for sale in my online store - Truth IS! Slogan Tees.  So when I've posted a picture, you can simply click on the hyperlink right below it to take you directly to my online shop.

There are only a few products posted so far in the online store, but please believe that there is much more to come! I originally only started creating the tees so that I could put my slogans out there, plus - I think they're cute. :)  But now I have found a use for the sale of these shirts, and am so thankful for divine inspiration!

I am in the process of establishing a non-profit organization, called His Abundant Storehouse (H.A.S.), which is purposed to assist single and solo mothers with offsetting their childcare, medical and food expenses. The need is definitely there, and I have experienced it myself at different times during my own journey through solo motherhood.  I believe that we are all given our life's experiences in order to be able to empathize with and ultimately be of service to others. At the same time, those of us who are in need of assistance of any kind, need to understand and acknowledge that there is nothing wrong with needing and asking for help. In this aspect of my life's journey, the lessons have been learned (more times than I care to remember), but nonetheless learned.

For some of us - especially single/solo moms - the act of giving to others or lending a helping hand, is so much of who we are, that we become uncomfortable or uneasy when, we in turn, are the ones who need help. Hear me when I say - whomever I am speaking to - and understand that this "discomfort" or "dis-ease" is nothing but a spirit of pride.  We are reminded by Proverbs 16:18 that "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."  If you haven't already done so, please learn the lesson before you put yourself in a position of  unnecessary struggle - I say this to you with love...

That being said, I have been inspired to contribute all of the proceeds from sales at Truth IS! Slogan Tees towards funding of His Abundant Storehouse.  I pray that this is well received by all who would wish nothing but positive energy and thoughts to what I am working to accomplish, and that H.A.S. is as bountiful a blessing as I have already envisioned it to be!

SuperNatural Woman

Truth IS! Slogan Tees

I've fought it for so long, some days refusing to even put it on.

But now I wear it with pride, because my perception of it - my TRUTH - is now crystal and clear.

You see, the "S" on my chest is not a curse, for I am highly favored and blessed.

This "S", that God chose for me, is meant to Sustain my faith, to Serve others and to Survive this life.

Not my opinion, but simply because God Said So!

Believe me - I've tried to let it go, but I can't and it won't let me be.

I know what it is to want to stop the world from spinning, and disappear for a time, in order to just...BREATHE.

So now, I humbly choose to Surrender to Him, Sacrifice for others, and Separate myself from the natural and ordinary.  The "S" on my chest makes my existence Supernatural and extraordinary!

This is a dedication to all of my ladies, who go above and beyond - my Sisters, raising their babies to be better than, working those 12+ hour days, finishing those college degrees, becoming entreprenuers and striving to be their genuine selves - all while trusting in God, who put the "S" on their chests, to finish the good work in them that HE began.

FAITH

"You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.  Trust in the Lord forever, for in Yahweh, the Lord, is everlasting strength." ~ Isaiah 26:3-4

Truth Is! Tees - "faith"

Faith is the blind love a child has for his parents.  When he is hungry, he knows that Daddy will be there.  When he is hurt, he knows that Mommy will be there.  When he just needs a hug, he knows you are there - simply by faith and not always by sight.


Our love for, and trust in God should be just that simple.  When you are hungry, He is there.  When you are hurting, He is there.  When you just need a hug, or a sense that whatever your situation looks like, it will be all right - you should have faith, and know that you know that you know - God is there to provide for your every need.


If you believe in God, then you know Love.  God IS Love!  And true love is the foundation of the trust which builds your faith.


I pray that your faith in God is ever-increasing, so that you may always trust and know that whatever you need will be provided, and that whatever you desire will be given unto you if it is God's Will - because He said so!


Amen...

Stutter

I stutter. Most folk don't realize it, since normally, I'm very thoughtful about the words that I speak so that I don't trip all over my words.  I also spell my words out mentally as I speak them, which helps me to keep the stutter to a minimum.  BUT, on those rare occasions, when I'm upset or speaking passionately about something, I do stutter.


There will soon come a time when I have to speak in public regularly, so I will likely be joining a Toastmasters group to help me with that.  Until then, do not expect to hear me reading any of my writings publicly.  The last time I shared a few poems with a group of folk was a few years ago when I was pregnant with Lailah Symone.  My poetry is very intimate and special to me, and I was soooo nervous, that I became very emotional during my reading.  I'll just blame it on the hormones....


Since I stutter, it gets difficult for me to express myself clearly when it matters most, so I write letters.  Oh, yes - your girl can compose a letter like no other!  So if you happen to be one of the lucky few to receive one from me - previously or in the future - just know that you've either severely pissed me off, or my love for you is such that I have to put pen to paper and let you know the real. 


If you've ever wondered, now you know :)

NO FOOLASSNESS

Truth IS! Slogan Tees

FOOLASSNESS - one of my favorite terms, and so apropos these days.  Let's break it down: first, the free dictionary's definition of FOOL is "one who is deficient in judgment, sense, or understanding".  Next, the definition of ASS is "a vain, self-important, silly, or aggressively stupid person".  Lastly, the suffix -NESS means the state of, or condition of being something, foolassness = the state of being being a fool ass.


That's all well and good, but for me, foolassness is defined simply as bullshit attitudes and behaviors that people choose to engage in when they feel they have a right to pass judgment on others.  When they take other peoples actions and life choices personally (even though those people likely have no thought of them).  Even when they decide to create unnecessary and chaotic situations in order to hurt others. So, it can be applied to many different scenarios.  


In short, if you've heard me use this term, then you are well aware that I have absolutely no tolerance for foolassness. Thus, I have coined the phrase "NO FOOLASSNESS".  You can love it or leave it alone.


*This writing is actually much nicer than the original version I had in mind, but an easy morning and much needed nap with my girls and my pup have allowed for this friendly revision.  Feel free to contact me if you need further explanation. :) 

God Says So...

He says that He loves me. He says He will provide for me. He says He will protect me. He says that I can trust Him.  I believe everything that he tells me - so why do I act as if I don't?  Well, that's over!  You've got me Lord, I SURRENDER!!!  Please believe that if God tells you what He is going to do, what you need to do or not do, and you don't listen - He'll be sure to get your attention, one way or another.  I know I'm a hard head, I know.  I know what He's been telling me to do, I know.  


Because my creative mind is prone to misinterpreting signals directed towards me, I always ask Him to speak clearly to me.  So my Creator went as far as sending a messenger to me - A MESSENGER - not once, but twice!  Yet, here I am, once again, being reminded that my help comes ONLY from HIM.  I'm done playing the superwoman role, I am retiring my cape, and the only thing that the "S" on my chest stands for is Shannon or Simone - depending on my mood.


So now I am dedicating this leg of my life to proving to myself and the world that all that I am, all that I have and all that I do, are of and from God - simply because God Says So!  For those who think you know me, you really don't, but know that I'm not here to please you.  So if you ain't ready to see what God does through me, I suggest you "hide your wives, hide your kids, and hide your husbands too"!